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Bill Laimbeer Would Take LeBron James Over Michael Jordan 'No Question'

2 hours 12 min ago
Former Detroit Pistons center Bill Laimbeer just added more fuel to the debate of who's better, LeBron James or Michael Jordan.

Laimbeer said on radio's "Dan Patrick Show" Thursday that there's "no question" he would take James over Jordan in his prime.

"He can do more," Laimbeer explained in the segment above. (The comments begin at 4:10). "Michael Jordan could score, make big shots and look spectacular at times ... But LeBron can get you 18 rebounds. LeBron can get you 15 assists or he can score 50 if he wanted to. The triple threat he poses is phenomenal."

Dan Patrick gave Laimbeer, currently the coach of the WNBA's New York Liberty, room to praise Jordan more, but the former Bad Boy wasn't having it for the most part. He complimented James for leading "role players" on the Cleveland Cavaliers to the NBA Finals. "Jordan couldn't have led this team to the finals," Laimbeer said.

In another comparison, the ex-Piston opined: "LeBron came into the league knowing how to play basketball and involve his teammates. Jordan had to learn that and they had to assemble some great teammates around him in order for him to win."

It should be noted that Laimbeer and Jordan have history. After the the Pistons defeated the Bulls in three-straight playoff series between 1988 and 1990, Detroit's Bad Boys walked off the court without acknowledging Jordan and Co. when the Bulls swept them in the Eastern Conference Finals.

And then, of course, there was this fist-flying encounter between Laimbeer and Jordan in the 1988 playoffs.

Yep, there's history there.

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Former House Speaker Dennis Hastert Indicted

2 hours 41 min ago
CHICAGO (AP) — Federal prosecutors have indicted former U.S. House Speaker House Dennis Hastert on bank-related charges.

A statement from the U.S. attorney's office in Chicago says the 73-year-old Illinois Republican is accused of structuring the withdrawal of $952,000 in cash in order to evade the requirement that banks report cash transactions over $10,000. He's also accused of lying to the FBI.

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Former House Speaker Dennis Hastert Indicted: Report

2 hours 52 min ago
WASHINGTON — The Justice Department has indicted former House Speaker Dennis Hastert on reporting evasion charges and lying to the FBI as part of an effort to pay off victims of “prior bad acts.”

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9 Books That Redefine 'Crazy'

3 hours 5 sec ago

Everyone is a little bit 'crazy.' At least that's my theory. And as a neurologist, I'm quasi-educated on the matter. Do I include myself in that statement? Of course I do! I wouldn't be a writer if I hadn't spent some time in therapy. Craziness is in the eye of the beholder, and the line between madness and sanity is often a gray one.

For me, literature has been a way to lessen the stigma of mental illness. Instead of using labels like 'crazy' to define a complex human being, these books present complicated characters who show us the nuances of mental illness, creating compassion and awareness.

Here are nine books that redefine 'crazy':

1. Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn. Our heroine has a troubled past. Her mother had Munchausen syndrome by proxy, literally sickening her daughter's childhood. The heroine's chosen coping mechanism is cutting -- with words. Her skin becomes an encyclopedia of her survival. As an adult, she becomes a reporter who returns to her hometown to find out who is killing girls down there. Thrown back into her mother's grip, she fights to keep herself not only sane, but alive, all while tracking down the killer.

2. Naked by David Sedaris. I warn you now: Do NOT read this book on an airplane, or you will be apologizing to all of your seat mates for your hiccupy, uncontrollable laughter. Making fun of himself (and his family), Sedaris has turned the memoir into a comic art form. In a "Plague of Tics," he enumerates the manifold tics from his Tourette's syndrome, including licking light switches and kissing newspapers, to his own humiliation and his father's ire.

3. Devil In the Details, Scenes from an Obsessive Girlhood by Jennifer Traig. Like Sedaris, this author describes her childhood OCDs, complete with hours of handwashing and a rarity called "scrupulosity," a disorder of hyper-religiousity where a person feels compelled to carry out religious rituals. Coming from a mixed marriage, the author was not actually well-versed in Judaism, so she invents her own pseudo-Jewish rituals, such as putting napkins on her head during meals and creating an original version of kashrut. Her behaviors ultimately lead to a visit to a perplexed rabbi who helps to make the diagnosis.

4. Tweak by Nic Sheff. This book stands out in the pantheon of addiction literature. (Though he also notes that he has bipolar disease, thus carrying a dual-diagnosis, as do many patients with addiction.) Following his father's excellent account of his child's descent into addiction in Beautiful Boy, Nic Sheff gets to tell his own side of the story. From meth binges, dating older actresses and a flirtation with alcoholism, this is one wild, cautionary tale of growing up.

5. Girl Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen. This list would be incomplete without the story of a girl who took a detour through a psych ward on her way to adulthood. The genre is memoir, but the book is just as much a mystery. The question burning through every chapter is, is she actually mentally ill? Kaysen offers evidence both for and against. One of her symptoms, "promiscuity," is hardly convincing. Yet another, depersonalization (where she scratches her skin and demands an X-ray to verify she has bones), seems a bit more so. When Kaysen finally gleans her diagnosis from all her medical records, "Borderline Personality Disorder," the answer is all the more vague and unsettling. We never truly know whether she was "certifiable" or not, which is perhaps the whole point.

6. The Interestings by Meg Wollitzer. In this novel, it is the main character's husband, not the protagonist herself, who suffers from depression. We are given a spyhole view into the spousal experience of depression, which also doubles as a history lesson in its treatment for the last 20 years. Her husband has been successfully treated with difficult-to-use MAO inhibitors -- until he nearly dies from eating food with tyramine (which interacts with this medication). He suffers through years of soul-sucking depression while trying medication after medication, until finally discovering an SSRI that evens out his neurotransmitters and delivers him back to himself.

7. An Unquiet Mind by Kay Jamison. A psychologist who is an expert in bipolar disease discusses her own experience with manic depression. Her unique perspective is at once scholarly and deeply personal. She resists taking Lithium, which slows her mood cycling, but also deadens her energy and highs. Mania is destructive, but at the same time, irresistably enticing. Unfortunately, it is also always followed for her by darkness, months of "pitiless, brackish, almost arterial levels of agony." In the grips of such depression, Jamison takes a massive overdose to assure a "successful" suicide (a success she reasons, "one can live without"), but is luckily thwarted by her brother. After time, she learns to embrace her medication as a gift which allows her to live.

8. It's Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vinzini. This is a sort of a "Boy Interrupted," with a haunting young voice telling his coming-of-age story in a psych ward. Each daily act during his depression is an effort, even eating or talking. Just being hurts. To lift himself out of this state, he focuses on the "anchors" that ground him while battling the "tentacles" that threaten to pull him back down at every turn. The young boy does beat his depression, but sadly in 2013, the author committed suicide. Sometimes craziness can seem like "kind of a funny story," but sometimes it is just painful and tragic. His story (like The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, as well as Unquiet Mind) serves as a reminder that depression is a real illness which can be fatal.

9. Little Black Lies by Sandra Block. In my new novel, the protagonist is a psychiatrist who sees her own psychiatrist for ADHD and PTSD stemming from childhood memories of her mother dying in a fire. While battling her own demons, she works to help her patients, and sometimes the two worlds collide. Little Black Lies is a novel of memory and madness, where sometimes the truth is more dangerous than the little black lies we tell ourselves just to survive.

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Barack Obama Supports Fired Bulls Coach Tom Thibodeau

4 hours 15 min ago
Two weeks after the Chicago Bulls were eliminated from the NBA playoffs, the team announced Thursday the firing of head coach Tom Thibodeau.

In a prepared statement, Bulls owner Jerry Reinsdorf provided murky reasons for why Thibodeau, who departs with a stellar record of 255-139 (.647), was fired after leading his team to the Eastern Conference semifinals.

"When everyone is on the same page, trust develops and teams can grow and succeed together," he wrote. "Unfortunately, there has been a departure from this culture. To ensure that the Chicago Bulls can continue to grow and succeed, we have decided that a change in the head coaching position is required."

ESPN reported last week that the Bulls were having serious discussions about whether or not to fire Thibodeau. Despite the team's success under Thibodeau, Sports Illustrated reported in January that his relationship with Bulls management was "beyond repair."

While Thibodeau may not have any supporters left in the Bulls' front office, there's one sort-of-important person who still has his back.

.@apat246 @chicagobulls love thibs and think he did a great job. Sorry to see him go but expect he will be snatched up soon by another team.

— President Obama (@POTUS) May 28, 2015

The president also tweeted his thoughts on the ongoing NBA playoffs, citing J.R. Smith, Steph Curry, and Kyle Korver as notable three-point shooters.

.@NathenVieira jr smith having a great season but the heart of the Cavs is Lebron. And no one can outshoot Curry - maybe Korver if wide open

— President Obama (@POTUS) May 28, 2015

President Obama does know that Kyle Korver is out for the rest of the season with an ankle injury, right?

Starting on June 4, Steph Curry and the Golden State Warriors will take on LeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers in the NBA Finals. But Curry seems to already have won a presidential BFF.

A photo posted by NBA (@nba) on Feb 25, 2015 at 7:19pm PST

Read the Bulls' full statement:

Chicago Bulls General Manager Gar Forman announced today that Tom Thibodeau will not be retained as the team’s head coach.

Chicago Bulls Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf said, “The Chicago Bulls have a history of achieving great success on and off the court. These accomplishments have been possible because of an organizational culture where input from all parts of the organization has been welcomed and valued, there has been a willingness to participate in a free flow of information, and there have been clear and consistent goals. While the head of each department of the organization must be free to make final decisions regarding his department, there must be free and open interdepartmental discussion and consideration of everyone's ideas and opinions. These internal discussions must not be considered an invasion of turf, and must remain private. Teams that consistently perform at the highest levels are able to come together and be unified across the organization-staff, players, coaches, management and ownership. When everyone is on the same page, trust develops and teams can grow and succeed together. Unfortunately, there has been a departure from this culture. To ensure that the Chicago Bulls can continue to grow and succeed, we have decided that a change in the head coaching position is required. Days like today are difficult, but necessary for us to achieve our goals and fulfill our commitments to our fans. I appreciate the contributions that Tom Thibodeau made to the Bulls organization. I have always respected his love of the game and wish him well in the future.”

Following 21 years in the NBA as an assistant coach (he was an advance scout in 1991-92), Chicago named Thibodeau the team’s head coach on June 23, 2010. During his five seasons at the helm of the Bulls, Thibodeau’s teams compiled an overall record of 255-139 (.647). The Bulls advanced to the playoffs five times during Thibodeau’s tenure, where he posted a postseason record of 23-28 (.451).

"When Tom was hired in 2010, he was right for our team and system at that time, and over the last five years we have had some success with Tom as our head coach,” said Chicago Bulls General Manager Gar Forman. “But as we looked ahead and evaluated how we as a team and an organization could continue to grow and improve, we believed a change in approach was needed."

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9 Words That Don't Exist, But Definitely Should

4 hours 59 min ago
The world is always changing, and it starts with your dictionary. Case in point:

Dude, totally been there. Similarly, here are some of our own offerings of new words that don't really exist yet, but definitely should in the future.

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Stunning Book Of Portraits Shows 'Beauty After Breast Cancer'

5 hours 11 min ago
When facing a preventative double mastectomy, Katelyn Carey had no idea what to expect. Now that she is past her procedure, she wants to tell other women in her position: You're not alone.

Carey, a nurse and mother of two, has a family history of breast cancer and underwent a preventative mastectomy at the age of 29. Inspired by her experience, she is creating Beauty After Breast Cancer, a book of portraits and narratives that explains what breast cancer survivors went through, and shows what their bodies look like now.

(Some images below may be considered NSFW.)

"Every six months I go in for a new prosthesis/insert and a new bra. Nobody really knows that half of my shape comes from the prosthesis. It’s not like I’m missing an arm or a leg (and I count my blessings for that!). I sometimes walk down the street and wonder how many women have a prosthesis under their blouse like mine. It’s comfortable to wear, and makes me look like me again."

Carey hopes to publish the book in the autumn of 2015. Her goal is for cancer centers and breast centers around the world to use the book as a tool to hearten women facing treatment and surgery by providing information about various surgeries, and personal stories from women who have had them.

"The one crucial difference between us and the other resources out there is that Beauty After Breast Cancer is the coordinated efforts of medical staff with breast cancer patients in order to create the book that we as patients wish we'd had at the time of our diagnosis," Carey told The Huffington Post. "I believe that modern medicine can be compassionate. I believe that we can use our hardships to help others who must walk similar paths to the ones we have stumbled on."

"Now, whenever I am feeling less-than-secure, I have only to look at my husband, or at the photos that show me through his eyes. Beautiful. Or I can look at one of my children’s hands, curled on my breast as he rests on my lap, and know that I will be here for my kids as long as they need me. I was strong for my family even before I had met them, and they find me beautiful. So how could I help but to feel my beauty now?"

Carey and photographer Joseph Linaschke have worked with 33 breast cancer survivors ranging in age from 29 to 82. These women have undergone lumpectomies and single and bilateral mastectomies. Some have chosen to have full or partial breast reconstructions; others have decided against reconstruction or even "deconstructed" their implants at a later date.

"We don't hold back, and the photos show both 'ideal' outcomes as well as surgeries that had complications." Carey said. "Yet we are still managing to be uplifting and unintimidating with the portraits and stories we are sharing. A woman who has just heard the words, 'you have breast cancer' does not need to be scared further. I feel the faceless portraits of scars remain too harsh for someone who has no experience with breast cancer."

"I had originally pictured a beautiful new set of boobs with an amazing mural of tattoos. But I now find that boobs are not essential to my beauty or femininity. The benefits of enduring another major surgery just aren’t there. It’s very empowering to realize that I have nothing to hide and no reason to hide. I realize now that my beauty comes from knowing that I already am beautiful- I don't have to do anything else."

Carey launched a Kickstarter fundraiser in October 2014 that fell short of its funding goal, but remains determined to see the book published.

"More and more I wish I had this book when I was going through my surgery," Carey wrote. "And I guess that's the point of all this."

See more stunning images and narratives from Beauty After Breast Cancer below, and learn more about the project here.

"I am a mass of scars. They tell the story of my life: from my hysterectomy, to my stretch marks from three children, to my gallbladder surgery, to my breast scars. But if anyone thinks those scars and stories somehow make me a lesser person, I don’t really care to know that person anyway. I am a thirty-two year survivor of breast cancer, and my life is full and rich."

"Cancer showed me the strength of my husband, and the depth of his love. As my dear husband, Dan, gently took off my bandaging he made sure he did not have a look of shock on his face, as he knew I was watching for his reaction. He lovingly cared for me all the way through the cancer and now, when I had no breasts, he loved me just the same, and emptied my drains for me with as much gentleness as he could. Even now, he prefers me without my mastectomy bra -- he loves me -- ME, breasts or no."

"I couldn’t stand the scar. While some people wear their scars as a testament of their strength, my scar reminded me of all that I was forced to change, about how life goes haywire despite your precautions, and how little control I have.  The scar was about what had been done to me. I needed to change it into a thing of beauty and strength that reflected who I’d become despite it.

And so Shoyru the dragon came to me. She is not hiding my scar, she is encompassing it and making it part of her own body.  She moves my eye’s line of sight to what IS there -- the beauty and fierceness -– and away from what is no longer.  Her arrival shifted me from loss to creativity, from what happened to me to what I chose for myself.  I am not hiding from what is or trying to go back to what was, I simply accept that cancer happened… and here is what I did with it."

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11 Must-Visit Food Halls Across the U.S.

5 hours 13 min ago
By Patty Lee

The word "food court" usually brings to mind the same-old joints serving the same-old stuff: sickly sweet chicken teriyaki, leaden slices of pizza and doughy, dry cinnamon buns. Not anymore. Today's food halls are far more ambitious, taking in some of the finest chefs, artisans and purveyors in town. Take a tour of 11 gastro-emporiums across the country that are redefining what it means to be a food court.

Krog Street Market, Atlanta
A sprawling complex located in one of ATL's hottest food 'hoods, the Inman Park hub boasts a dozen eat-in restaurants and bars, along with nearly a dozen more retail shops.
To eat there: Find Tex-Mex specialties (bean-and-cheese nachos, puffy tacos) at chef Ford Fry's Superica; meat-centric cooking (grilled beef-cheek bread pudding, braised brisket) at The Cockentrice; and Japanese small plates and cocktails by ace bartender Arianne Fielder at Craft Izakaya.
To take on the road: Grab a scoop from cult-favorite ice cream shop Jeni's Splendid or chocolate from bean-to-bar cocoa maker Xocolatl.
What's next: Krog Street will continue to bring in new vendors, including Spice Road Chicken stall chef Asha Gomez and another full-service restaurant and bar from some of ATL's top bartenders. (Photo by Sarah Dodge)
99 Krog St.; 770-434-2400

Gansevoort Market, New York City
Chelsea Market has some new competition thanks to the recent opening of this industrial-chic food hall in the Meatpacking District boasting 24 vendors and a small but stunning skylit dine-in area.
To eat there: Taking a note from Basque tavernas, Donostia doles out pintxos that feature both fresh and preserved seafood. The Express outpost of David Bouhadana's Sushi Dojo, on the other hand, focuses on raw fish available in rolls or a chirashi bowl.
To take on the road: A treat from Dana's Bakery, which does French macarons in all-American flavors like s'mores, red velvet and Key lime pie.
Read more about NYC's thriving food hall scene here. (Photo by Kelly Dobkin)
52 Gansevoort St.

St. Roch Market, New Orleans
Set in the historic home of a 19th-century market by the same name, the icon — which had been closed since Hurricane Katrina — made a big comeback this April with a new roster of 15 artisanal vendors.
To eat there: Along with a number of seafood slingers (this is NOLA, after all) like Curious Oyster Company and Elysian Seafood, you'll also find spots such as Koreole — serving Korean-Creole mash-ups like japchalaya — and Mayhaw, an ingredient-driven cocktail bar from drinks maven Ali Mills (Dash and Pony, Patois).
To take on the road: Cochon Butcher alum Kristopher Doll's first solo venture, Shank Charcuterie, is stocked with his top-notch sausages and other meats. (Photo by Rush Jagoe)
2381 St. Claude Ave.; 504-609-3813

The Hall, San Francisco
The Mid-Market revitalization took a delicious turn last fall, when this upscale food hall highlighting six local vendors and a bar (open till 11 PM nightly) made its debut. There's communal indoor seating, along with a space for outdoor dining.
To eat there: Scott Peterson and Ted Wilson, who opened The Hall, also run Fine & Rare, which turns out inventive seafood dishes (crab Louie salad, house-smoked salmon Reuben) and pours wines from Wilson's self-titled label. Food truck Little Green Cyclo has gone brick-and-mortar with Vietnamese dishes (beef pho, banh mi) that use sustainably sourced and organic ingredients. Click here for more recommendations.
To take on the road: Fuel up for your trip home with coffee at Dignitá. (Photo by Virginia Miller)
1028 Market St.; 415-558-8293

Union Station, Denver
After a $54 million renovation, this restored train depot re-opened last summer with a slew of new food and drink establishments, including a burger joint, throwback ice cream parlor and a hidden bar.
To eat there: Located just north of the Great Hall, Mercantile Dining & Provision isn't just the biggest restaurant inside Union Station, it's also one of the hottest. Run by chef Alex Seidel (Fruition), the sprawling 5,000-sq.-ft. space houses a two-in-one concept: a restaurant with a European-inspired menu, plus a market selling artisanal goods. For details on more Union Station vendors, click here.
To take on the road: Grab a smoothie, sandwich or salad for your ride at Fresh EXchange or a boozy milkshake at MilkBox Ice Creamery.
1701 Wynkoop St.

Grand Central Market, Los Angeles
After a century of peddling food and wares in Downtown LA, this open-air bazaar has been undergoing a major revamp over the last year. A fresh wave of food vendors have breathed new life into the spiffed-up market, making it a true rival to West Coast counterparts like the Ferry Building and Melrose Market.
What's new: Newcomers include two new seafood options, Mark Peel's Bombo (serving steamed mussels, fish stew, etc.) and The Oyster Gourmet, plus Madcapra, the falafel spot from NYC transplants Sara Kramer and Sarah Hymanson (formerly of Brooklyn's Glasserie).
To eat there: Chase down smoked meats and Southern sides with an ice-cold Shiner Bock at Horse Thief BBQ or fill up on egg-centric specialties at the single-concept Eggslut.
To take on the road: Health-minded shoppers can pick up sips from Press Brothers Juicery — with combos like Liquid Gold (pineapple, lemon, mint) and Charge (carrot, celery, apple) — or kombucha by Better Booch. Those in need of a java fix should stop by G&B Coffee, co-owned by U.S. Barista Championship winner Charles Babinski.
317 S. Broadway; 213-624-2378

To find out about more must-visit food halls, read the full story on Zagat!

More from Zagat:

America's Next Hot Food Cities

The 10 Best New Burgers Around the U.S.

America's Most Iconic New Dishes

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Esquire Gathers Your Favorite Comedians To Uncover The Greatest Jokes Ever Told

5 hours 44 min ago
Mitch Hedberg for sainthood.

What comes to mind when you think of the best joke you've ever heard? Maybe it's just stupid or maybe it's dirty, but for whatever reason, it's memorable for you. On Thursday, Esquire released a feature on the best jokes ever told by your favorite comedians, picked by your favorite comedians.

Wyatt Cenac, Mike Birbiglia, Jessi Klein and some of the best stand-up comedians working today recalled the best joke they've ever heard in the piece. Some are very punny, others a tad raunchy, but all of them are funny in their own way.

Here are a few of the best.

"Lavell Crawford. Very, very fat man. Very funny. He had a joke: The other day I got out of the car and this little boy was walking by. He just stopped and he stared at me and he was like, 'Whoa.' Then I was like, 'Boy, whatchu lookin’ at?' Little boy was like, 'I can’t even fit all of you in my eyes.'" - Damon Wayans Jr.

"It’s from Anthony Jeselnik: When I finished high school, I wanted to take my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle, but my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle." - Riki Lindhome

"By Mitch Hedberg: I'm sick of following my dreams -- I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with them later." - Natasha Leggero

Check out the Esquire write-up for the rest of the greatest jokes ever told.

Photograph by Matthew Salacuse, Courtesy of Esquire

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5 Guys Overlooked in Love Who Might Actually Make You Happy

5 hours 53 min ago
In the dating world, many people looking for love have conscious or unconscious shopping lists of qualities or characteristics they'd like in their ideal mate. Most people want chemistry, laughter, wealth and to be treated well. Also popular are good looks, snappy dressing and good hygiene. It's been said that "Mad Men's" Don Draper was the epitome of desirability. He's the eternal 'bad-boy' we know we should grow out of once we reached adulthood. But did Don ever stay faithful to anyone or make a woman really happy?

If you want love, devotion and loyalty, check out these gems in the rough who will potentially worship you for the rest of your life.

1. Bald men. Men who embrace their baldness are more appealing than the guy wearing a comb-over or rug. (Bruce Willis vs. Donald Trump) They're not trying to fool anyone. I personally respect a guy who is honest with himself and others. 80% of men lose some of their hair. If they lose all of it, there's less grooming time -- which means more time to spend sharing their sex drive with you. Rumors (probably started by balding men) are that too much testosterone and machismo are the reasons why men lose their hair, making them more masculine and increasing their sex drive. Is this why balding men seem ballsier than other men?

2. Divorced dads. Their life experience is more multi-faceted than carefree, never-married single men or childless divorced guys. Caring for children in their lives demonstrates they can handle responsibility and that they prioritize family.

3. Older men. They've seen it all and done it all. Now they want to rest and focus on you, or have a companion to do the best of it all over again. If you like to be wined and dined, consider an older partner.

4. Mr. Cuddly. If you had a favorite teddy bear as a child, now is the time to revisit that coziness -- with grown-up benefits. This guy doesn't spend all his time in the gym, which means he'll be spending his time out dining with you. Gabriel Iglesias says, "I'm not fat, I'm fluffy." A guy with a few extra pounds probably likes his comforts. As his companion, you'll be indulged as well. You can both spread out together with no judgement!

5. Bad dressers. In real estate, fixer-uppers are always a great value. Maybe he doesn't care how he looks or just doesn't know any better. Maybe he's the worst on the block, but inside, he's got great bones. Perhaps that sloppy dresser has a rich inner life that involves reading books or binge-watching cable shows. A schlump might pay more attention to you than to himself. If you are willing to do the light sanding and other renovations, you'll reap great rewards. Spackle not included.

When reviewing these five kinds of guys, I realized there's someone who is all of these men rolled into one: Louis CK: The balding, over 40, divorced dad is a cuddly, schlumpy dresser. He's a creative, hard working risk-taker who focuses on being a good dad and how soul-crushing bad relationships can be. If he met the right person, he'd rock their world in an anti-Don Draper way.

For a humorous peek at amorous adventures after 50, check out The Last Place She'd Look or visit, and follow Arlene on Facebook.

For more by Arlene Schindler on Huffington Post, click here.

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Hillary Clinton Is Taking Democrats Backward on Climate Change

5 hours 56 min ago
When Barack Obama announced his Presidential campaign in Springfield, Illinois he spoke of climate change.

Let's be the generation that finally frees America from the tyranny of oil. We can harness homegrown, alternative fuels like ethanol and spur the production of more fuel-efficient cars. We can set up a system for capping greenhouse gases. We can turn this crisis of global warming into a moment of opportunity for innovation, and job creation, and an incentive for businesses that will serve as a model for the world. Let's be the generation that makes future generations proud of what we did here.

Obama was the first major party nominee for President who made climate change a central theme included in every major campaign speech. He even showed politicians how to make it sound poetic. It helped elect him twice. Climate change or clean energy policy was a significant portion of every State of the Union address. That's something environmentalists should celebrate for what it says about the electoral appeal of the issue.

Nearly seven weeks after she announced her campaign for President, Hillary Clinton has yet to make a noticeable statement on climate change. At her first campaign speech in South Carolina Wednesday she didn't mention it all, despite the threat of more hurricanes hitting the state.

The best gesture for the climate movement so far is a tweet from an adviser. It's a disappointing step backward from having climate take center stage.

It's a risky move since Clinton already has a credibility problem on climate. Her most significant actions to date are promoting fracking as Secretary of State and allowing oil industry influence to corrupt the state department process on Keystone XL pipeline. The climate crisis requires bold, aggressive action against entrenched corporate special interests, which isn't a style of politics Clinton is known for.

Clinton will probably have an easy time getting endorsements from beltway green groups hoping to gain influence. But as Pat Quinn learned in Illinois, and Mark Udall learned in Colorado, promoting regulated fracking is a tough sell to environmental voters no matter what endorsements a candidate can brag about. Without a major change to her campaign, primary voters will be forced to look elsewhere for a climate champion.

After making a joke in South Carolina about coloring her hair, Clinton claimed, "you're not going to see me shrink from a fight." But so far, she's ducking the most urgent fight of our time.

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5 Reasons Illinoisans Are Paying for the Madigan/Rauner Budget Fight

6 hours 33 min ago
Illinois lawmakers only have until midnight May 31 to approve a state budget and spending plan that is balanced and funds all of the programs the state needs to run efficiently. The House and Senate Democratic majorities very likely will approve one, but it will be rejected, in whole or in part, by the Republican governor because it will spend more than the state's taxpayers are required to give, at the moment.

Then, we citizens will sweat it out into June, July, and perhaps August, as 30-year House Speaker Michael Madigan and veteran private equity dealmaker Gov. Bruce Rauner try out outlast and outmaneuver each other.

Madigan held one of his rare, classic press conferences Monday to explain for the media and taxpayers his approach.

Here's why the whole exercise is fruitless and we, my fellow citizens, are the suckers being played for the fools we apparently are:

1. Madigan reminded all within earshot that when Rauner first gave his state budget address, which did indeed include more than $2 billion in pension savings that were unlikely to be achieved, that the Speaker called it "reckless" then and has been calling it "reckless" since.

2. Then the Speaker proceeded to tell reporters that he consistently has said Illinois needs a balanced approach of both spending cuts and new revenue. Therefore, he said, House and Senate Democrats will work this week to pass a budget for next year that spends more than $3 billion more than the state takes from taxpayers.

3. So, you might logically ask, if Rauner's budget with $2 billion in phantom savings was "reckless," what does that make Madigan's admittedly out-of-whack $3 billion-plus budget? Extremely reckless? (Actually, it appears to be closer to a $4 billion hole.)

4. Rauner chose to create and manage secret, closed-door working groups on the budget and other key pieces of legislation he sought as part of his plan to do things differently, shake up Springfield and turn around Illinois. Differently how? Before Madigan took to the podium on Memorial Day, though, Rauner's office had issued a statement suggesting Madigan was walking away and "doubling down on a broken budget and massive tax hike."

5. That statement was followed by more of the same from the House and Senate Republican leaders, as well as the Illinois Republican Party.

Check out three more reasons why Illinoisans are really the ones to get the short end of the budget stick at Reboot Illinois.

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Rand Paul Says Crime Is A 'Spiritual Problem'

6 hours 47 min ago
Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul (R) on Wednesday made an unexpected remark about the nature of crime in a city that has seen more than its share of it.

"There is crime going on all across America. It is not a racial thing, it is a spiritual problem," the 2016 presidential hopeful said during a campaign stop in the South Side of Chicago, according to the Chicago Tribune.

Speaking before a mostly African-American crowd outside New Beginnings Church in Woodlawn, Paul continued, "I think government can play a role in public safety, but I don't think government can mend a broken spirit. Government can't provide you salvation, government can't save you ... Ultimately, salvation is something you accept yourselves."

The libertarian-leaning senator's attempt to tie crime to spirituality, rather than to more tangible factors like poverty, racially biased policies and inadequate economic investment, sounded less like what Paul has said in the past and more like the traditional message touted by other GOP candidates seeking the party's nomination.

Typically, Paul's stances on crime and criminal justice issues have shared more with socially progressive viewpoints than socially conservative ones: He has called for demilitarized police and reform of racist drug laws, and argued that poverty impacts incarceration rates. Of the Republican candidates in the race, Paul has been the most open and unabashed in his effort to connect with black voters, despite the friction it sometimes causes in his own party.

In his speech on Wednesday, Paul highlighted his ability to be tough on crime, while also making the effort to reach out to the largely black audience.

"You may be saying to yourself, 'Why is this white guy saying black lives matter, what does he know about crime in my neighborhood?'" Paul said, referring to the rallying cry that has become popular in the aftermath of recent deaths of African-American men at the hands of white police officers. "Well, I've got crime in my neighborhood too ... We've got some kind of thing going on in our country, and we need to come to grips with it."

Paul's attempts to connect with the audience on the issue of racial justice were a sign that while Chicago's black voters have historically voted Democrat in a perennially blue state, it's exactly these voters Paul wants -- and needs. Still, the candidate took time to tout his economic message as well, saying he'd like to see "dramatically lowered" taxes for businesses on a South Side block he visited. He noted that he especially wants to lower taxes for businesses that are run by and employed locals.

"My idea is not to take money from Washington and send it to the South Side of Chicago, but take money from the South Side of Chicago and never send it to Washington," Paul said, according to CBS Chicago.

Paul had been invited to speak by New Beginnings Pastor Corey Brooks, who has previously faced criticism for supporting the candidacy of Illinois Gov. Bruce Rauner, a Republican.

“On the South Side, it doesn’t matter if you’re a Democrat or Republican, we’re just excited that you’re coming to hear our views,” Brooks said on Wednesday, according to DNAinfo Chicago.

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Alec Baldwin's 'Love Ride' Surprises Young Couple With Hilarious Mobile Therapy

9 hours 25 min ago
Maybe Jack Donaghy is exactly the person you'd want analyzing your relationship.

Alec Baldwin is back for more mobile relationship therapy, and this time, he's brought the "cone of silence." On this episode of "Love Ride," Baldwin and his sidekick Jemima Kirke are getting to know Jennie and Jimme. Jimme is a musician who wants his fans to believe he's younger than he is, and Baldwin wants to know when he's going to man up and get a real job.

We could watch Alec Baldwin read the phone book. Are there still phone books?

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Top Five Detour Adventures You Need to Know About Between Las Vegas and Denver

9 hours 31 min ago
As an adventure photographer and writer I am always searching for the "off the beaten track" activities and photo ops while on my travels. You can find me climbing cliffs and waterfalls and asking around for the hidden gem "locals only" spots. So when my 75-year-old father wanted to do a road trip from Las Vegas to Denver together, I struggled with not only finding cool places to stop and explore, but also ones that were easy enough for my dad to do.

I inherited my sense of travel and adventure from my dad, but I felt like he had given up on getting out and exploring years ago. Either because in his old age travel has just become too difficult or because these places were just too hard to find. Thanks to modern technology, and good old-fashioned conversations with locals at a diner in Utah, I was able to restore my dad's pioneer spirit and plan a fun road trip full of surprise adventures. I discovered that some of these places are way easier to find than you would think.

1. The Narrows Hike at Zion National Park

A nice way to break up the drive and get out of the heat of the desert is by stopping in Zion National Park. We discovered a hidden gem in the park called "The Narrows". The Narrows is deep within the canyon of Zion National Park and you have to take a shuttle from the visitor's center to get there. The hike itself gets its name, because you are hiking along a river and then the two steep canyon walls on either side of you (about 20 feet wide) start getting more narrow and more narrow until you are hiking through the river itself. We wore just bathing suits, water shoes, and had our cameras in a waterproof backpack. It was such a fun, refreshing hike to splash through the canyon, stop to swim, and just take hilarious videos and photos. It's definitely one of the more unique, fun, hikes I have ever done.

2. Antelope Canyon in Page, Arizona

Most of you have seen photos of this place and not ever realized where it was. Not to mention it is the location of the world's most expensive photo ever sold by photographer Peter Lik ($6.5 million). Located just a few miles outside of Page, Arizona, you have to book a tour to go see either the Upper or Lower Antelope canyon. Upper Antelope is flat and sandy and the more popular of the two. Most pictures you have seen are from the Upper. The Lower Antelope is accessed via ladders and a crack in the earth and is a bit more strenuous to visit. We booked a tour and had to jump into a Suburban with a Navajo guide who drove us miles over a sandy wash in the middle of the desert until we ended up at the crack of this canyon. It was so surreal and beautiful walking through the narrow sandstone cracks that have been carved by water over a million years. I was obsessed with the lines, lighting, and colors there and I just couldn't stop taking photos!

3. Horseshoe Bend in Page, Arizona

This landmark is only a 10 minute drive from Antelope Canyon, easy to find from the main road, and just a 15 minute walk up over a hill to a cliff's edge about 1,000 feet high overlooking the Colorado River. Horseshoe Bend aptly gets its name because it is the point of the Colorado River that somehow sharply curves around a huge rock formation like a horseshoe. All ages can make this easy trek, but beware because there is no fence, wall, or boundary and you can literally just walk off a cliff if you are not careful. Even though I am not afraid of heights, it still was nerve-wracking to stand on the edge to take a photo. Instead, I had to sit and try to take it all in, because it was one of the most majestic views I have ever witnessed.

4. Arches National Park in Moab, Utah

The next day we took off again to hit the town of Moab, which is the epicenter for visiting Arches National Park, Canyonlands National Park, Petrified Forest National Park, and Dead Horse Point State Park. Not to mention there is every adventure activity to do there from riding ATVs to white water rafting. Moab is such a cute little town with an actual nightlife and people come from all over to back pack and discover the glorious, unique landscape by day, and drink in the bars by night. We opted to go to the most famous of all, Arches National Park and to drive through Monument Valley on the way there. The landscape of Utah changes so quickly as you are driving. Just as quickly as the desert turned into mountains and rivers in Zion, it turned back into desert, and then into bizarre rock formations and arches dotting the horizon. We found out a lot about the geology of that area. That the landscape used to be the bottom of an ocean, then the waters evaporated leaving a huge salt bed, that over millions of years had silt and sediment deposited on top of it from the rivers of the Rocky Mountains. All of that weight made the salt unstable and it pushed up all of these rock formations, which the wind and sand eroded into the arches you see today. It's quite amazing to even imagine all of this when you are standing in this alien landscape.

5. The Crystal Mill in Marble, Colorado

About an hour outside of Aspen Colorado is a little town called Marble. We had heard of this infamous Crystal Mill from the 1890's that is part of a ghost town deep into the wilderness. There are no roads to the Mill. You either need an ATV or have to hike in the wilderness for 8 hours to get to the Mill. We opted to rent an ATV from the guy who literally had a sign in his yard "ATV's for rent". Armed with a picnic from Whole Foods, a wilderness map, and an ATV, we were ready to go! We rode for hours along gorgeous scenic roads, over boulders climbing to 11,000 feet in elevation on a cliff edge to find the Mill. In the distance were the blue, ice-capped Rocky Mountains and it was just breathtaking...literally. I am so glad that my Dad drove the ATV so I could sit on the back and take photos. When we finally reached the mill, we just sat and had our picnic and tried to take it all in.

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Here's How Many People In Each State May Not Be Able To Afford Insurance If The Supreme Court Rules Against Obamacare

12 hours 28 min ago
The Supreme Court is expected to issue a decision in a major new lawsuit against Obamacare this June, and the health coverage for millions hangs in the balance.

This challenge to the Affordable Care Act, called King v. Burwell, came from longtime Obamacare opponents who claim that, because of a key phrase in the law, the federal government may provide tax credit subsidies only in states that operate their own health insurance exchanges. Thirty-four states declined to establish these marketplaces, and instead left that responsibility in the hands of the federal government.

If the Supreme Court rules for the plaintiffs in this case, it would eliminate health insurance subsidies for 7.5 million low- and moderate-income people in those states, causing most of them to become uninsured when their premiums become unaffordable without financial assistance.

Here's how the numbers break down in each state with a federally operated health insurance exchange.

Infographic by Alissa Scheller for The Huffington Post. Jonathan Cohn and Jesse Rifkin contributed reporting.

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Chicago's Most Scenic Bike Trails

13 hours 25 min ago
Spin class is great for clearing your conscience. (Adios, salted-caramel cupcakes.) But could it be any darker or louder? This weekend, break out your real bike--the one that moves--and log some miles on these leafy, scenic trails that'll get you outdoors, off the city streets and back into pedaling your own way.

Lakefront Trail (South). More details.

Green Bay Road Trail. More details.

North Branch Trail. More details.

Kal-Haven Trail. More details.

Illinois Prairie Path. More details.

Palos Forest Preserve. More details.

Morton Arboretum. More details.

Des Plains River Trail. More details.

The 606. More details.

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Food Critic Josh Ozersky Drowned During Seizure, Medical Examiner Says

15 hours 21 min ago
CHICAGO (AP) — The Cook County medical examiner's office says food critic Josh Ozersky, who was found dead in a Chicago hotel room earlier this month, drowned in a shower while suffering a seizure.

The 47-year-old Ozersky, known for his witty and snarky writing generally focused on his obsession with meat, was in Chicago for the James Beard Foundation Awards. He was found dead May 4 at the Conrad Chicago Hotel. The medical examiner's office announced the cause of death Wednesday.

Ozersky was a food writer for Esquire and a frequent contributor to other publications, including the Wall Street Journal and Food & Wine. He also was founding editor of New York Magazine's Grub Street blog.

Ozersky was on the awards committee for this year's Beard Foundation awards, which honors top chefs.

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Man Who Blew Pot Into Pet Chameleon's Face Acquitted Of Animal Cruelty

Wed, 2015-05-27 18:52
CHICAGO (AP) — A judge has acquitted a Chicago man of animal cruelty charges filed after the man posted a video of himself smoking marijuana with a chameleon.

After viewing the video and hearing the arguments of prosecutors and defense attorneys, Cook County Circuit Judge Robert Kuzas ruled Wednesday that Bruce Blunt's behavior was "uncalled for and immature" but didn't rise to criminal behavior. Blunt posted a Facebook video of himself smoking marijuana with the chameleon, Binna, earlier this year. That prompted a complaint from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.

After his acquittal, Blunt said he blew smoke into the chameleon's mouth because it seemed to calm the aggressive reptile.

The Chicago Tribune reports ( ) Blunt said he hopes to get the chameleon back from Chicago Animal Care and Control.


Information from: Chicago Tribune,

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Jimmy John's Enforces An 'Insanely Restrictive' Dress Code On Franchisees And Their Workers

Wed, 2015-05-27 17:30
WASHINGTON -- If you want to work at a Jimmy John's sandwich shop, you'll need to bring a "killer work ethic" and a "rock star personality," as the chain's job advertisements like to say.

You're also going to need a surprisingly particular wardrobe.

Despite its efforts to cultivate a cheeky and irreverent image, the Jimmy John's franchise apparently enforces a strict grooming and dress code that's distributed to the chain's franchisees around the country. The Huffington Post obtained a copy of the most recent guide, which lays out more than two pages' worth of clothing and hygiene stipulations that sandwich-makers, delivery drivers and other employees must meet.

Workers who don't have the appropriate clothes must find them, and franchisees who fail to uphold the sometimes-confusing guidelines can be downgraded by corporate. According to Jimmy John's franchisees who spoke on the condition of anonymity, it's not uncommon for store owners to dip into their own pockets to help employees meet the corporate dress requirements.

There's nothing unique about a chain wanting uniformity across stores, and many of the dress code's stipulations -- like those restricting beard length, jewelry, clothing color or tattoos -- are fairly common in the restaurant world. (Starbucks, for instance, only recently relaxed its tattoo policy for workers.)

What sets the Jimmy John's code apart is its level of detail. One store owner described it as "insanely restrictive." The guide regulates not just the color of workers' dress shoes but the color of their shoe soles (dark brown or black only). Pants can't have any cuffs or cargo pockets. Workers' jeans can't have any "excessive stitching."

Jimmy John's Dress Code

Some stipulations from the guide:

  • If your hair happens to be dyed, you may want to take your application over to Potbelly: "Coloring of hair limited to natural hair colors only (no purple, green, etc.)"

  • The guide instructs workers on how to shave: "If you have a beard you must shave below your jaw line to create a clean distinctive line and shave a portion of your cheek to create a clean distinctive line." (Some restaurants other than Jimmy John's don't allow beards at all.)

  • Pants must be plain blue jeans or "medium tan" khakis. No "excessive stitching" allowed, though the term "excessive" is not defined. Pants must extend "below your ankle bone." Rolls or cuffs are forbidden, as are skinny jeans.

  • No high-tops allowed. Low-rise athletic shoes may be worn if they are black, white, gray or red, but "any other accent color must be limited to 25% or less of the shoe." Dress shoes must be black or dark brown, as must the soles. "All socks must cover the ankle bone."

  • Only one cause bracelet may be worn, and it must be "professionally made, for an approved national cause, must be no wider than ½ inch, must be all one color, and must be the 'rubber' style."

  • Only one plain earring per ear; hoops may have a diameter no wider than a dime's. "All holes in ears resulting from gauges or plugs that are the size of a dime and larger than 3/32" must be filled with a Kaos Softwear Flesh Tone Hider Plug that matches the color of the employee's skin. The approved sizes are from 9/16" (14mm) to 3/32" (2.4mm). Gauge holes that are larger than a dime must be covered by Band-Aids. Gauge holes that are smaller than 3.32" must be left empty."

  • "No visible tattoos or portions of tattoos are allowed."

The rules are complicated enough that Jimmy John's corporate created a pictorial guide, which HuffPost also obtained, providing examples of what's kosher and what's not. Yet even after a close reading of the dress code, it's not necessarily clear from the pictorial guide why one pair of pants or shoes is acceptable while another is not:

Jimmy John's Dress Code Pictorial

Silly as it may seem, such a strict dress code may be putting franchisees in a bind. Jimmy John's shops tend to pay close to the minimum wage, employing college and high school students looking for extra cash and low-income earners trying to make a living. The guidelines can end up forcing workers -- or their bosses -- to pay for clothes they don't already have.

If they don't, there may be a greater price to pay. Jimmy John's representatives regularly visit franchise locations, auditing owners on the cleanliness, maintenance and appearance inside their stores -- including uniform adherence. If workers are out of compliance, a franchisee's grade can slip. And that can make it harder to, say, expand and open up more locations, a common path to profitability.

The Jimmy John's dress code cuts to the heart of the problem with the franchising model. Jimmy John's operates under such a model, just like McDonald's, Subway and almost all other brand-name fast-food companies. That means most of the stores are owned and operated by individual franchisees, rather than Jimmy John's corporate. Franchisees get to buy into an established brand and business model, and in exchange they pay fees to the franchiser.

Under this arrangement, the franchisees are technically the employers, which means they -- not Jimmy John's or any other franchiser -- are on the hook when, say, labor laws get broken. Critics of this system say it allows big franchise brands to dodge accountability in the stores that bear their names. With the franchise model now under attack on several legal fronts, the franchise lobby continues to insist that franchisees are the ones who control the workers inside stores.

But that argument gets tricky when Jimmy John's corporate is setting work conditions of the most elemental sort, regulating what a worker must look like when he or she shows up for a shift. If Jimmy John's can dictate what color your hair is, how much stitching is on the pockets of your jeans, or how you shave your neck in the morning -- and essentially punish franchisees for noncompliance -- is the company not exerting at least some control over the work experience?

Jimmy John's declined to answer HuffPost's questions regarding the dress code.

In addition to its tight dress code, Jimmy John's also created a restrictive noncompete agreement for workers to sign, as HuffPost first reported last year.

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